pessimistic = realistic

am I stupid?
or am I absolutely insane?

I know that we will not be together,
but I love you BIG

we came from completely different world,
different culture,
different family,
different perception of life,
different ways of life

we call our God in different name

how could I possibly thinking, or hoping
that one day, ONE DAY,
I definitely have you?

there is no freakin' way to make it that way

for your information
it hurts
it really hurts
to love and to be loved by someone
who will never be yours ...

you always ask me to be optimistic,
and leave my pessimist thoughts,
but I'm trying to be realistic, dude
though it hurts

I am preparing my heart

when I was saying 'don't go', I really meant it.
and when I say 'good bye' later, I will always mean it, too.
I will, hopefully.

:(

It doesn't even matter how much you say "I love you"
It doesn't even matter how much you say "I need you"
It doesn't even matter how much you say "I miss you"
as long as you're not there beside me

I love you, not your words
I need you, not your words
I miss you, not your words

Then be here, please

"it's not the same without you,
Because it takes two to whisper quietly"
Vanilla Twilight - Owl City

The Our Father

Our Father
Who art in heaven
Hallowed be Thy Name
Thy Kingdom come
Thy Will be done
on earth as it is in Heaven
Give us this day our daily bread
And forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive
those who trespass against us
And lead us not into temptation
but deliver us from evil
Amen

past is a past !

please, Sir
you are the most beautiful one
I kinda love you like much
I do anything for you, ANYTHING
as long as it might make you happy
but it was yesterday, long long long time ago

if there's a hope, I'll step forward and remember
if there's an uncertainty, I'll step back and forget

it's dynamic, it's not static
it's stupid, it's not even important

I was not recovered, I was changed
I was not agreeing, I was pretending

it's not a poem
it doesn't have any kinda special words
it doesn't even have any rhyme

it's just kinda my feelings
and I know that it's over
'cause I am moving on
and I believe that this is my 'happiness'

past is a past

so go away, would you?

teenage oh teenage

I'm a teenager.
I know this feelings are normal as a teenager.
but I just so sick about all of this stuffs.

I thought I was happy.
nice friends, cute and sweet bf, wonderful doggies.
then I realized that I am completely alone.
it was so suck, so I was like "errgh, seriously, I need someone!"
but no one was there.
then I thought I was sad.

but then I realized, that was just my stupid thought.
I have my own bf who loves me, my friends, my dogs.
then I was fine.
then I thought I was happy.

then I thought I was sad.

then I thought I was happy. again.

then I thought I was sad. again.

it happens all the time, you know?

I'm so tired to be a teenager.
when will I grow up?

sekolah?

Sejujurnya kenapa orang harus sekolah?

Apa ada gunanya?

Sekolah untuk mencari nilai.
Itu sudah seperti sebuah hukum.
Kita tidak sekolah untuk menuntut ilmu, tetapi menuntut nilai.
Nilai yang bagus bisa dipakai untuk lulus sekolah dan dianggap sebagai anak pintar.
Bisa dipakai untuk masuk perguruan tinggi ternama dengan mudah.
Sehingga bisa mendapat pekerjaan apa pun yang diinginkan.

Tapi untuk diketahui, menurutku, nilai itu sama sekali ga ada artinya.
Apalagi kalau nilai itu dipakai untuk mengukur seberapa pintar seseorang.

Kok bisa?

Liat aja, nilai itu kebanyakan ga murni.
Entah nyontek, entah ngerpek, entah lirik sana lirik sini, entah ngawur, nilai itu bukan dari otak murni.

Dan ga adil banget.
Seseorang yang belajar keras kebanyakan nilainya di bawah nilai orang yang ga belajar sama sekali tapi pinter nyontek, pinter ngerpek, atau beruntung dalam hal ngawur.

Jadi kepikiran kan?
Sekolah itu bukan untuk menuntut ilmu.
Sekolah itu untuk menuntut nilai.
Dan nilai ga mengukur sepintar apa seseorang dalam pelajaran.

Tapi,

Nilai mengukur sepintar apa seseorang dalam hal mencontek.

*kebanyakan.